Soul Asylum (chapter six)

The orignal sin, the glimmer of her eyes and moon dust. Landscapes, tall buildings, heart on sleeves, players, young love, old love, new love, scary love, the good, the ugly and the truth within the lie. My heart pounded when she talked, when she frowned, laughed, when she glanced my way, when she tucks her hair behind her ear, when she listens to me speak when we speak. Time moves slower when shes near. The way trains move and car crashes, violins and the orchastra of my love all in one for her. All of me. All of her. She was feet away from my bedroom, sleeping, or laying awake. All I knew in that moment was that I had to have her.

Outside on the balcony she told me about her ex Brandon and how he worshipped pancakes and syrup and how it was weird that she had just remembered that about him. We choose what we remember about our past, blocking out most of the bad. Still, the pain is in the wound. We just remember not to itch. But there was so much more to remember, but she had choosen to tell me something small that only few could re call. Then she laughed and asked about my ex’s. I told her about a past relationship with a girl when I was sixteen, (the era when Kate was non existint to me), how me and this girl dated for five or six months, and how she talked threw mummbles and hated pancakes but loved tuna and brown toast that she had it for practically every meal. ”Yikes” she said dramatically. ”What are you two chatting about?” called Sean from the table to which everyone was sat at. ”Ex’s” kate said, unimpressed most likely of noseyness. ”Ah! don’t go there, my ex, she was a physco,” ”for putting up with you i’m sure,” anna smirked, everyone laughed. So there, I layed in the most beautiful city i’ve ever been, with the girl of my dreams a few feet from me, with a over whelming urge to hold her while she sleeps. The notes of sort of contomplation over took me, I layed awake thinking too much about ideas of ways to convince myself to stay, and thought little of reasons to leave. My eyes fell depper and heavier, as the room spid around with the alcohol still in my system, everything all at once.

When I woke up, the sunshine poured into the room, the white decoration and oak wood all seemed too steady, and it felt as if I was a ghost in this room. few people would sleep to overthink, and wake to do the same. I am one of the few. I looked over at the alarm clock at the bedside table, 7:04 Am, it was a routine since I started working for holiday home buy and sell that I woke up early to eat, run and shower. Typically I would lay in bed regretting this decision to wake up so early and wish I could lay in bed all day with day time TV on low with freshly made coffee just to appear as a covilised grown up. I don’t like coffee much, or tea, I never understoodthe big deal, but keith forces me because hes obsessed since birth so i just join in to seem as I said, grown up. Deep down inside I still feel like that awkward teenage angst and rarely but now reacently, I sometimes feel like a child, lost and scared. Eager to find refuege in some loving arms.

My mouth felt like the Sahra Desert so I threw on my shorts and long sleeved shirt quickly to got to the kitchen to get a glass of water. the room I slept in looked lived in, but somehow it felt as do I was looking through my own memory in present time. It was overthinking in it element. I traced down the hall quitely, passing everyones rooms hoping to not wake anyone, but I seen a shadow outside on the balcony. I sighed and filled a glass with tap water, eager to taste the water from this forgein place. My heart warmed up to realise kate was outside, dressed in her pyjamas with a bed head and a ciggerette in hand. I leaped as fast as I could to get to her, but I unintentionally scared her enough that she hit me on the head with her book. ”Oh my god, i’m so sorry Johnothon, I just got a fright I didn’t know that was you,” she gasped. The heat pounded on the two of us and the light was  blinding, enough to make a ordinary girl hate the dun for the unforgiving light, capturing every distinctive feature, but kate. She was so breath taking, even half asleep and in shock. ”No your alright, what are you doing up so early anyhow?” I asked her curiously. ”Old habits die hard, but it was hard to sleep in the heat really, what about yourself, you looked farely tipsy last night,” she smiled sheepishly at me. ”Did I? I can’t argue with that,” i chuckled. ”Me too, I was pretty tipsy myself,” she giggled. ”I wake up early everyday, its actually annonying at this point,” my honesty made Kate smile cheerfully at me with a strange look in her eyes. ”I have a idea, if you want to you can, if not, then you truely are boring,” I acted offended, ”I am not boring, what is it?”  ”Well no big deal, but since i’m allergic to being lost and it looks like everyones going to be asleep for the next while, do you want to go to town for abit,” she smiled. That very moment I felt like I was in the right place at the right time, for the first time in the last few years actually. ”Sure,” I said calmly, ”When?” ”Great, your not boring then” she joked flipping her hair while smoking her ciggerette. ”give me like, three minutes,” she nodded, getting up and going inside. I didn’t expect Kate to wear baggy shorts and a vest top to sleep, I was thinking more silk and robes, less mom and wine. Either way, I wanted to see that every morning for the rest of my life. ”Okay, i’ll be here,” I called. Three minutes shortly passed and I was simply reading her book she left on the chair, time travel, aliens, cool stuff. Everything I started to notice about kate, didn’t demeen my fantasy of her, it just made me suprised. I was fond of her enough to learn that the new is better then the old idea I had of her, tooked away dusty in a closet somewhere far from here.

It took me more then fifteen minutes for her to gather herself, so i expected that. Not trying to get into sterotyping, but this usually happens with all the girls i’ve encountered in my lifetime. ”Sorry i took longer then I anticipated, lets go,” Kate looked like the professional tourist, I couldn’t help but take it in, my aesthetic was her. Its all the rays of illumanting light she pours into herself and everyone around her. Despite from the sad beauty, that a tremendace gift to have. ”no sunscreen?”, Kate said worriedly. ”Nope,” i said slipping on my shoes, kate sprayed sunscreen on my arms and face jokingly and giggled. ”Thats payback for scaring me, plus you wont burn so, your welcome,” she giggled some more. I rubbed it in letting her mock me without a trace of annoyance.

We arrived shortly outside the hotel, walking slowly taking in all of the surroundings. We continued taking about our past relationships, family, personal thoughts and kate said something unexpected as we were outside a small coffee house that gave me some more motivation to tell her how I feel. ”I feel so comfterable around you, it’s so rare, I can just be myself, I can’t belive I told you about my whole daydreaming thing about becoming a activist, thats kind of childish”. We both went inside the coffee house and sat down on a red leather couch and relaxed with the AC cooling us down. ”Kate i’ve been meaning to tell you something-” the instant i siad that kates phone rung and I settled back into the couch gathering my thoughts, slecting the right words to say. ”Sorry” she mummbled, Anna had rung her asking her where we went and when we would be back. She put her phone back in her bag and the waitress walked over with our food and drinks. Marveling at kates beauty the waitress said, ”you two look very nice togther,” we both looked up. ”Oh, were just good friends, thank you though,” Kate sipped her drink and I looked at the waitress in pain. We shared a distasted look. She walked away. ”So what were you going to say?”. I cannot simply discourage myself now, she doesn’t even know how I feel.

”I think that, if you want to, we should go on a date, I’ve been wanting to take you out for a while now and well, its up to you,” Kate slowly looked up at me threw her big blue eyes. ”Here, in Rhodes?” she asked coolly. ”if you want?” I said. ”Well, give me a reason, now give me three reasons why we should go on this date,” she smiled. I chuckled. ”A rendezvous sounds good in this heat, we could have fun and i feel comfortable around you too,” she smiled at that. ”We could actually go full tourist and do something fun, like go full tourist and venture forbidding places,” I said excitedly. ”Now I have to go,” Kate joined in. ”So, I get to take you out?” I said shyly. ”Sure, why not”. I couldn’t come to terms with my cocky self, its as if the coward inside me set fire to a car and walked away with some heavy rock playing loudly in the back round, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to put that fire out. For the first time, I had done something reckless, and when my heart stopped pounding from this strange behavior i’ll try not to tear myself up about it.

We both were summond by everyone to come back with boxed sandwiches












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