I felt my youth dripping away, like a cold day, raining unforgivably on a new sundress. Surrounded by loved ones, strangers and parts of me I take away from these people I know, and some I don’t, yet. My childhood and teenage years coming to a close I rationalise with myself, I know I’m growing up. Adult, a child comes to mind, me. Small temper minded, a young girl. Trapped inside my adolescent body, mind and everything along them lines. I think back, all of the heartbreak, loosing people I taught would be with me forever. The stars, the cosmic, the universal truth of it all. They were shooting stars, glimpses of a bright echo of something, and leaving the instant you love. I found that, some stay. Some fall in love with everything you are. It isn’t all about relationships and a genuine soulmate. It’s a connection between two people, a unforgettable taste of ceremony that brings two lost souls together, that chance and fate could never quite comprehend. A platonic friendship. Whilst we grow, we loose a lot. Teeth, Skin cells, aspirations, teachers and finally, people. That’s just it, loosing makes us gain. Vulnerability of this loss is tremendously large and everything that goes alongside this isn’t but pain it’s traumatic but funnily enough, it helps.
Cutting barriers with people and things with whomever and whatever it is is what makes us humane. When my youth finally leaves, and I am independent and ‘free’, I’ll still be the child that seeks so much more than distance and only a fragment of the bigger picture.
Experience with life is what us, kids. Where never going to loose that, don’t ever try. Embrace your playfulness, your innocence. Except that things change, people leave, your going to get hurt but what comes is growth and that, is something spectacular.